So, I’m the Single Girl in our group of friends.
Nine of us, four couples and me. Now usually this does not bother me and we are a very close group of friends, more like a family. Sometimes we all hang out together, sometimes just a few of us, sometimes just the girls, etc. I love these friends and they are amazing.
In the beginning, there were seven of us. Two couples, two singles and me. Then I brought two of the couples together (including hooking up one of my best male friends and best female friends.) That is what I do, I network, I match, I make things happen. Both couples are very happy and I am very happy for them.
But, I have been realizing, being the Ninth really is odd.
My friends always include me but our mentalities are different. When we go out, it’s nice dinners and rarely drinks after. I often sit at the head of the table, as the couples all seem to have a way of sitting next to one another. They like to stay in bed late, presumably enjoying a round of morning sex and can never make it to brunch before 1pm. They do not want to stay out late, get crazy and often would rather be spending time with their significant other.
Now, I have to say, I understand it and if I were them, I would be the same way.
And most of the time this does not bother me, except it is a holiday weekend, all the couples are out of town (on separate adventures) and I went to brunch alone today, which is fine, but something about this holiday screams fun, camping, BBQs, up-north Michigan adventures. I did not think ahead, make plans and, really, I am finding myself not really wanting to hang out with the few “B-Squad” friends I do have here.
This has been a time for me to reflect, clean my apartment, organize, blog and catch up, which also has been nice and was needed but the truth is, I am finding myself a bit lonely. I think this is the first time I have let myself admit that, being the tough girl that I am. The thing is, there is a big difference between lonely and desperate and I refuse to hang out with someone I do not care for, or even, just because I am bored or need to feel like someone is there.
Oh, and while laughable, the last 10 or so Facebook photos that are tagged, are from a recent red carpet part we all attended. Every picture of me, I am posed with one of the couples and the new joke is that I am the token 3rd in awkward threesomes.